[Tanx] Tale of Woe on a TA

[J. Braun]

This time for real!

I ran into this letter to Milt about another one of my *adventures*. I
thought you might find it amusing during lockdown

J.

Sorry to hear about your crash Milt. You sound as if you are unhurt
which is the main thing.
I'm not sure what you mean by my "death march". We've christened that
puddle (pond?) you decided not to cross as Lake Milt.
If it will make you feel any better let me tell you my story of woe.
The weekend before last my nephew and I were supposed to meet Dave at
Whitcomb Summit for a ride to route sheet the rally loops. As usual I
was late and Dave had given up on me and gone home.
Owen and I unloaded the bikes, the Transalp for me and my MT250 for
him. You may remember it because of its strawberry injector oil. I
didn't bring the maps because Dave said he had some new routes and
would bring his.
Owen and I did the first loop from memory without problem. We refilled
the 250 and took off on the 2nd loop. It went well but we had extra
time before getting back to WS to meet Beth so I suggested we go
exploring.
Off down this road we went and didn't worry as it kept getting smaller
and rougher. Finally we were down to single track when we came upon a
couple of hikers. Since I was on the Transalp and Owen is a new rider
I decided to get advice about what was ahead. After some discussion I
decided to keep going. I was assured that the trail came out to a road
at the bottom of a steep hill. The hikers seemed to think that we
could make it down without too much difficulty. And they were right.
It was steep but by being careful we got to the bottom with no
problems.
But that's where our problems began.
Problem #1 - we lost the trail and it was too steep to go back up.
After half an hour of mucking about we found a hiking trail and began
to follow it.
Problem #2 - the river. I was trying to decide how best to ford it
since it was only about 20" deep and 30' across but Owen wanted to try
the foot bridge. Good idea but the end of the bridge was 30" in the
air. So we lifted the 250 pound MT up and onto it with only minimal
grunting and took it across. Then came the 400 pound Transalp. With
much huffing and puffing we finally got it up and across.
Problem #3 - We are now on a hiking trail that had steep inclines with
roots and sharp turns. Nothing you can get a run at and no traction.
More pushing, huffing and puffing.
Now it's getting late. And dark. Finally we just abandoned the bikes
in the woods and walked out by flashlight. We must have walked a
couple of miles before we got to the road and it all looked nasty.
When we got to the road we flipped a coin as we had no idea where we
were.
A mile and a half later we came to a village and knocked on the first
door we came to. A 75 year old woman came to the door and answered our
plea for water and a phone. I called Beth on her cel phone and found
out that she had called out the State Police since we were 2 1/2 hours
overdue. The woman said that it would be easier for her to drive us to
WS than to give Beth directions and have her get lost. What a kind
soul!
When we got to WS there were two cruisers waiting. I went to tell them
we were OK but Beth got to me first and started giving me hell. The
cops just stood there trying not to laugh at the shit I was getting.
They probably thought that anything they were going to say was easy
compared to what I was getting. Believe me, it was a very cold and
silent ride home to CT.
-- Aftermath --
I called Dave the next morning and asked if he would come help me get
the bikes out of the woods. I knew where the trail ended and so we
hiked in from there. Where it seemed like a mile or two at night it
was less than half a mile in the morning. It must have been because it
was pitch black and we were so exhausted.
The bikes started ok and we pushed them up the first incline and got
going. We got stuck a couple of times but nothing that was a show
stopper. The big deal was that the trail was 6" wide next to a 25'
drop into the river in a couple of places. Not a good place to slip or
slide.
Then we got to a spot where the Transalp was just not going to go. A
slick slope with roots sticking out and a tree to go around. No amount
of pushing a shoving was getting it up and over. Luckily I had brought
a block and tackle so we put a tie down strap around a tree and then
hooked onto the Transalp's frame. It finally budged.
Just as we were getting going again a group of young (18-20's) hikers
came by. The first informed us that motorized vehicles were prohibited
on this trail. I explained that I had gotten lost and certainly had no
intention on being here. She repeated that I wasn't supposed to be
there and I tried to be reasonable. Finally, she led her merry band
ahead but each one of the little tree huggers had to repeat that
motorized vehicles were prohibited. Not one of them offered to help us
and I was ready to wipe the smirk off the face of the last one with a
tire iron. I can only hope that when one of them needs rescuing that
I'm there to proclaim that motorized helicopters are prohibited and
they can limp out with their broken leg.
Dave and I finally got out from there without further incident and got
the bikes loaded on my trailer. Dave got his map out and we checked it
for the route Owen and I had taken. It started out as a double dashed
line and then just ended. No single dashes or dotted lines, nothing
until we got to the trail along the river.
But we got through it in one piece. Beth calmed down after a few days
of reminding me that this wasn't the first "adventure" I'd ever had. I
must admit that I didn't know there were so many synonyms for  "dumb"
and  "stupid". Owen wasn't too put off by it all and wants to try it
again in the spring but probably with a map next time. I'm going to be
working out with weights this winter so that I can pick up a Transalp
single handed.
Lastly, I'd still be there pushing the Transalp if it weren't for
Dave's help. Thanks!
I only wish I'd taken some pictures. ;)
J.
31 Oct 2004


-- 

There's two theories to arguing with a woman,
Neither one works.

Read my blog - mondaymotomadness.blogspot.com
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